This has been the hardest lesson I have had to learn over the past year, boundaries.
Imagine if you will every conversation that you have there is an invisible fence between you and the other person. This is a good thing, they can see you you can see them. It is not a fence of isolation it is a fence to keep you in your space and your friend in there space. This fence should be there with every relationship you have. From your closest relationships of spouse, children, parents, siblings, to secondary relationships, friends, neighbors, and coworkers. I must stay on my side of the way.
This even works with our relationship with God. I can't cross over into being God.
Staying on my side of the line in my relationships is hard. I always think from the other person's point of view.
Because of this I feel responsible for:
-Other people's happiness
Praise God I have gotten better at this (I think)
I love those close to me but I am not responsible for their happiness nor are they responsible for mine. That does not mean I do not love and support them, it does mean I know what my responsibilities are and what their responsibilities are.
I highly recommend Henry Townsends book, Boundaries, if you struggle with always thinking other people's thoughts, directing other people's actions, or feeling other people's emotions. Those things are not healthy for you and me. They are stressing us out. Plus we are not helping the person whose boundary we crossed.
Plus you need to control your own boundaries. Your mother, sister, friend, in laws, church member, coworker, and even spouse should not be controlling your life by crossing your boundaries. God himself will not cross your boundaries. He does not work that way. (Dr. Cloud's book discusses this in detail.)
What are your boundaries? How have you let people cross them? Whose boundaries have you crossed?
God bless you
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